Tenacious Blood Clots

The ultra sound indicates the blood clots are still hanging on in his lower left leg.  He can walk about three blocks without any pain, but anymore than that is painful.  The Chemo effects are wearing off, though not very decidedly.  He has difficulty sleeping and feels terrible most of the time.  He is trying to have a good attitude--he serves the family and in church and applies for work and networks with people to see what direction to go to provide for our family.  He would love to subsist on soda water and crackers, but he knows better so he nibbles at other things.  His hair is coming back slowly and softly. He realizes this is only temporary.

Addendum

Roland wanted me to add that when the doctor saw him she noted that he wasn't wearing a hat.  Then she told him his hair made him look like a newly hatched chick.  He thanked her and told her it was the nicest thing anyone had told him all day.  She didn't know how to interpret that.

She also told us she felt very good about the treatment plan as it had been carried out and that all that can be done was done.

Little Surprise...

When Roland met with the oncologist, we were both surprised to learn that today's Chemo is the last dose!  We both thought there would be another round in three weeks.  So it feels like the adventure is coming to a close.  His leg is still swollen and she wants to know whether he still has clots or if the veins are permanently stretched out to determine how to adjust the Lovenox injections, so he will have an ultrasound.  His PET CT scan is scheduled for the end of July.  If the nodules are gone, he will be considered in remission.  That is as far into the future as I care to see right now.

Disappointed, But Not Giving Up

We found out that Roland did not get the SUU job he was hoping for. :-( 

Before receiving that news I was told a story of a family who was riding a crowded passenger train. The father held his blind daughter on his lap since there was limited seating.  After a while, another passenger noticing the discomfort of the father offered to hold his child to give him a break.  The father accepted the offer and the girl complied.  Her father asked her if she knew on whose lap she sat.  She answered, "No, but you do."

We are striving for this kind of trust.  We don't know why Roland was not offered this job, but our loving Father in Heaven knows.  We have hope that this will make us stronger somehow.

Wednesday Roland will have more Chemo. 

Happy Days

I could see Roland relax when we were reunited. Tears came easily when he held our first grandchild.  He said as he rested next to James that looking at him was more effective at relieving his nausea than any of his prescribed medicines. That's the power of our minds.

 He enjoyed seeing extended family and friends and appreciated all the love and conversations.

Four Generations

Connection with dear to our hearts, Kaitlyn

Now that we are home, he is so appreciative of all the little things I do in the home, for him, and for the children.  I didn't expect him to do those things while I was away.  I am happy to be home and in a similar way that it was difficult to leave Roland to care for himself and the children when I came to help with the baby, I had trouble leaving Tikla, Austin and baby James.  I know they will be just fine without my help, but I had grown accustomed to caring for them.

Roland seems more energetic than he was before.  He works in the yard, goes to work, takes a nap before dinner and doesn't seem grumpy, in fact he is quite cheerful.  Two days ago, Roland was saying how amazing it is that he has not been sick even once since he began this adventure despite the children all having a touch of something here and there and almost at the same time he noticed a small lump in his underarm area.  We both gulped--hoping it wasn't a lymph node.  I made an appointment with his regular doctor whom he saw yesterday.  It is not a big concern, but it could be an infection of some kind. (Most likely a cyst, but it could be an abscess)   Since he is under the effects of Chemo his doctor prescribed antibiotics just to be safe.  That was good news!

More Nausea

Roland is still nauseous from Chemo treatments on Wednesday.  He is doing his best to keep the household running while I am helping Tikla with her new baby boy.  He has a video interview for the SUU job he is hoping for on Wednesday.  His next Chemo is in two weeks. We video call and talk on the phone, but he doesn't have much time between keeping the hum of the home happening, working and sleeping.  I am grateful to be able to be of help to Tikla as Austin is in Denver for the week.  She is slowly getting better and getting to know her adorable gift.  I want to be with Roland because he isn't eating much.  I think I could help with that.  It will be great to see him this weekend for the baby's blessing.

New Life All Around Us

After a lot of preparation by Roland, including digging 18 holes in very rocky dirt, filling them with loamy topsoil and compost, planning and installing a drip irrigation system to all of them, the little foot-high evergreens (arborvitae) in two inch pots that will grow tall some day are ready to be planted.  They are a symbol of new life and growth.

At the same time new life grows within our daughter's womb.  He moves around in his now cramped quarters reminding her of his ever increasing arm span and girth.  It seems he is saying, "Here is my foot.  Wanna count my toes?"

Cherry blossoms flutter down onto fresh green blades of grass and tulips stand tall adorned with their vividly colored crowns    As my tulip-loving friend reminded me, those crowns were earned as the under-ground bulb was subjected to a cold winter before emerging in doubled glory (they multiply from year to year).  Spring will come for Roland's cancer and even for me in my struggly part of the adventure.

How thankful we feel that his cancer was discovered in time to be able to treat it and that he has had the strength to endure the necessary pain and fatigue.  We are grateful to the many friends and family members who have walked with us and refilled our water bottles along the way. (In the case of Linda, literally :-))